I think my water broke! Those four golden words is the culmination of 9 months of preparation for THE day. Of course, when these four words can put your wife in labor you never know. So it becomes imperative to be prepared. And I mean prepared all the time for the last 3 weeks of the third trimester. What are trimesters? Learn it from our little article on Trimesters.
What exactly do these four words mean? Simply, it means that the diaphragm encapsulating the embryonic fluids has broken and your wife in labor needs to be rushed to a hospital. By labor what we mean is that your wife is about to give birth. Dude! How and when the word labor came into being the beautiful word you can ever hear we will never know but it is the word that brings life into this world.
Okay, let us take a step back now and really try to digest few things that will happen during labor and what you as the man who got her pregnant in the first place should not say. These are in no particular order but everyone is important so as to have a wonderful labor. Oh! And most of the things are from my own personal experience.
Don’t think or ask if my wife in labor?
What we mean by this statement is when she says, “My water broke” you better believe it and do not second guess. Come what may do not ever ask “Are you sure?”. I did the same mistake and my face was nearly pushed close to the scene of where the water broke.
I know it is a natural reaction to ask if we are sure as you ay have had several false alarms. But only a women will know when the baby wants to come out and it does, all hell breaks loose. Cramps start to come which can be pretty excruciating especially for first-time mothers. Then you need to pack or take your packed bags, rush to the hospital, inform your family while you are rushing out. On top of that, she will be huffing and puffing because of the cramps. In the middle of all this chaos if you stop and ask you are a dead man!
Never tell her, “Everything will be fine.”
That is one statement which though seems pretty okay to use in the situation can have a boomerang effect. With all the pain and god knows how much longer she needs to bear it till its okay for the baby to come out. “Everything will be fine”, is the last word she will want to hear. If you have used it then be ready to get a killer gaze or in my case little scratch on the arm.
Honey, did we pack everything?
Come on! Man, you cannot ask this question to your wife in labor. She has to deliver the biggest package of her life and the last thing she will remember is what items to pack or take to the hospital. I am sure most prudent couples will have packed all the necessary items 2 weeks prior. Check out What to Pack In The Delivery Bag For Hospital
You look great honey
Huh! What a thing to say, man. All these weeks or months you may not have said such a wonderful line and now suddenly. She will see right through your nervousness. Besides, she absolutely knows she is not looking great so saying otherwise is a death wish. Of course, your wife in labor may happen during the day when she is nicely dressed but trust me she will have a cringed face for the next few hours.
Breathe honey breathe, remember your Lamaze classes
Are you sure you want to say that? It is as good as committing suicide. Lamaze classes are great to build confidence but in that moment everything will go out of the window. So asking her to try to remember the teachings is like asking the dragon to remember how to breathe fire. There is a slight twist to this one. Once you are inside the hospital and in the labor room. When the nurse asks her to breathe she will oblige. Haha! Yeah, I am laughing because the same words did not work in your case. Do you know why? She knows it is because of your sperms she is in this position, to hell with bringing life into the world.
You are doing great, I am here
This statement is like a double edged sword. If you say it near her face in all seriousness then all is good. But one hint of a smile when you are saying this, your hands which is holding hers will get crushed. Words cannot tell you how much force a wife in labor can exert, you have to experience it to know. So if you are planning to tell her she is doing great then better not hold her hands.
Push, Push, Push, Push
The nurses are there, the doc probably will be there, even some other attendants may be present who will keep egging her on. You should also do the same but do not ever go close to her face and keep saying push, push, push. I did the same and in return got held by the scruff of my neck. Of course, you need to encourage her but at the same time give her some space to take in the fresh air.
I will just be back
After she has delivered your baby, don’t tell her you will be back in a while and go see the baby. Yes, you are excited but your wife needs you more than ever now. She has taken out a human being from her 8-10 inches wide vagina, she will be sweating, dripping with blood and other fluids. She needs your soothing presence to comfort her.
So there you go, some statements worth remembering not to divulge but at the same time use them judicially. In the end, all that matters is a successful pregnancy without anyone getting hurt. How was your experience, do you have any other quirky statements to tell us? Write about it down below.