Daddy daughter relation is perhaps the most intriguing and fulfilling relationships. Nurturing it the right way will always ensure that as a dad you are the most sought after man in her life.
This kind of bond helps in a lot of things especially your daughters idea of what a never-leave relation ought to be.
The other day I planned for a small day out with my daughter. We usually do this whenever my wife wants some timeout. We went to her favorite play arena where she can jump and play with other kids.
So there I was sitting on the side watching her play. I started to think about how important this kind of outings was for us. Not just creating memories for her, it just occurred to me that I can teach my daughter something unexpected. And I must say it was like a tube-light moment for me.
Daddy Daughter relation chord struck
As I was looking at her jump and play around the arena. It occurred to me that as Dads we become a role model for our daughters. They envision how their future partners should treat them.
I sat up and took thought to myself, how I was affecting my daughter’s relationship choices for the future. I mean you can think about it, how likely is it that someone will open the door of the car for them. Or for that matter how many lads will ask for permission to take them out on a date?
The answer is next to nil. I realized that not only can I role model to her about the basics of being polite and caring. I wanted to impart something much more significant.
Bang! It hit me like an express train.
I can teach my daughter about how some great long lasting relations can be built with some essential ingredients. One of them being – Attentiveness.
Yes, paying attention is perhaps the single most important cog in the wheel of making cannot-leave-them kind of relationships. No, I am not advocating that you teach your daughter to look for always pleasing partners. A partner that waits on them or agrees to every thing they have to say. Rather they ought to be looking (when they start looking) for someone who cares about them, what they do and like.
How to become a more attentive dad?
That day I decided to be as attentive as I can be for her. I arrived at five things that I can do to show my attentiveness. These pointers are helpful for any relation, but I will tailor it for today’s article.
Putting the mobile away
In our other blog Child Behavior Management, Kids Misbehaving When Parents Focus On Mobiles. We delved upon this subject at length. Mobile can easily distract you when you are with your children.
No matter if your child is watching some movie and they want you to sit with them. Don’t end up using your mobile. It shows how disinterested you are about spending time with them.
However, if you need to see the mobile then let them know the reason. Don’t think about them as kids. My daughter perfectly understands when I tell her I am checking office emails.
But the bottom line is to avoid using your phones when you ought to be spending time with your kids.
Asking my daughter how her day was.
My daughter goes to school and later the day care. So apparently she is away from the house for as long as I am working. In my case, I have been fortunate enough to be able to drop and pick my daughter from school.
Why did I say, fortunately? Well because during the drive time I can speak to her and ask her about the day. Children can be very vague at first but if we consistently keep asking them then one day they open.
The daddy daughter bond is further strengthened when they open up and speak to you about their day.
Do be careful about not paying attention to what she has to say. If you are paying attention, then you both will end up have a nice conversation. I always end up knowing who did what in day care.
Remember the details
Another part of showing that you have been attentive is remembering details. I still remember when my daughter told me that she made a sandwich in school. I reiterate it back to her by asking her if they had any more cooking lessons.
My daughter also loves it when I remember and compliment on her bangles, bow, flower, hairband that she wore some other day.
Daddy daughter activities
Play some activity with her that requires some degree of intelligence. You can play puzzles, memory card, etc. It is not the game that is important but how well both of you agree on the rules of the match. Your attentiveness is shown when you catch her breaking the rules. Of course, you need to be lighthearted about catching her. All these small items show your kid that you are genuine about everything.
Be attentive by under promising and over delivering
It might sound strange to you but when you tell your daughter that you will get that blue balloon from office. You need to remember to get it. If you are unable to get, something does tell her the reality. It is pretty bad precedence when you say yes to just about everything. But none of the promises get fulfilled.
I know you must be wondering how this part ties up with the overall picture of attentiveness? Well, the answer is simple. When you promise something, it tells your daughter that you have understood her requirement. When the promise gets fulfilled, it tells her that you are an attentive man of your word.
Lets put it all together about this daddy daughter significant relation lesson
Love and friendship can be expressed in a variety of ways. But I am 100% sure that attentiveness or the state of being physically and mentally present at that moment is of utmost importance.
I know from now on all father daughter times are going to get my full attention. I am sure there are other ways to show attentiveness.
What are your family ways to show attentiveness? Head over to the comments below to tell us.